One of the words that is repeated throughout the Old Testament to the children of Israel is “remember”. They were exhorted to remember their God, the care He had given, the love He had shown. It would keep them going when the world around them tried to tell them that He had left them.
It’s an important factor in this world where we live. For often circumstances try to tell us a different story than what we are choosing to believe. Today, for me, it was a day to remember. I find it ironic that at this moment as I sit here to write it all down the song playing in the background bellows “He loves us oh how He loves us”. It’s been 16 years now, but I can remember it, even now, like it happened yesterday.
It was one of the more difficult seasons in life. It felt as if the world around us was taking over. David had his own business at the time where jobs were few and far between. Our five children were ages 10 to 5 months. Feeding a family of 7 and keeping a roof over our heads felt like an ominous task on the little income we had coming in. Each penny became sacred as we trusted God to somehow stretch them like we had known Him to do with the loaves and fishes.
Out of nowhere it hit me. It had been years since I had tasted it and even then I had only had it once. I hadn’t thought of that honey baked turkey since. Yet on this day out of nowhere the memory of its taste flooded my very being welling up the desire to have it once again.
I started the calculations in my mind. If I scrimped here could I have enough to pay the $25.00 and buy a small one to satisfy my longing? If I could just buy one of those turkeys…I could smell it, taste it.
The calculator in my brain started adding it all up. Maybe somewhere I would find some leftover change. I reasoned it all out that we could eat it for a several days. After much deliberation it finally hit me. The purchase to satisfy my longing was just too costly. I set the desire aside, speaking of it to no one.
A day or two later a friend called to invite me to lunch. She had been through tough financial times before. She understood what a nice lunch would do to my soul. She would bring her children over to babysit mine. How fast could I say yes?
As we drove down the road she told me. “I put dinner in your refrigerator while you were getting your children settled.” Another oasis in the desert was offered.
We enjoyed a leisurely lunch where she listened, allowing me to reveal my weariness. She understood. Her husband had been in medical school for years, working odd jobs, to keep their family of 6 afloat. Having the opportunity to talk to someone who understood did wonders to me that day. That in itself was a gift. Little did I know it was only the tip of the iceberg.
Time passes too quickly in those getaway moments. Before you knew it lunch was over and we were headed back home to my reality of small children and tight finances. She gathered up her teens, gave me a final hug and headed out the door. I headed to the refrigerator to see what we were having for dinner.
As I opened the door, there it sat. My honey baked turkey breast.
The tears began to fall as I realized how deeply I was loved. I had never spoken a word to anyone about my secret desire. There was only one who knew. God, Himself.
Love came down and rescued me that day. God placed a desire within me two days prior knowing He would bring it to pass. While the walls of this world threatened to swallow me up, God came. It wasn’t because I whispered some eloquent prayer. Nor was it because I asked. It was simply and only because He loves me.
He loves me, oh how He loves me. I remember.
©Julie L. Todd; 2013
My Long and Winding Road 